Why 'Networking' Doesn't Work the Way You're Told

Key Takeaways

• This piece focuses on career strategy realities in India, not outlier narratives.
• Compensation numbers should be interpreted with role scope, market cycle, and switching friction.
• Use decision frameworks and evidence checks before acting on title or salary headlines.

On This Page

• The Expectation
• The Reality
• Salary and Growth Reality
• Where Most People Get Stuck
• Who Should Avoid This Path
• Decision Framework
• Originality Lens
• Final Verdict

The Expectation

Career advice is obsessed with networking. "Your network is your net worth." "80% of jobs come through connections." "It's not what you know, it's who you know." LinkedIn is full of people telling you to send 10 connection requests daily and reach out to strangers for "informational interviews."

The expectation: Build a large network, nurture relationships, and when you need a job, simply tap your connections. Jobs will flow to you effortlessly because you have 1000+ LinkedIn connections. Success is just a few "warm introductions" away.

This advice sounds logical. Get to know people. Ask for help when needed. What could go wrong?

The Reality

Why Traditional Networking Fails for Most People:

The Math of "Networking":

You send 100 "networking" messages on LinkedIn. Here's what actually happens:

• 70 are never opened (busy people, spam filters)
• 20 are read and ignored (no time, no interest)
• 8 respond with a polite "Happy to help" but never follow through
• 2 actually have a call with you
• 0.5 remember you three months later when they can actually help

Why "Building Your Network" Before You Need It Fails:

1. You Can't Store Social Capital: A connection made 2 years ago doesn't remember you vividly. The relationship decays without maintenance, and maintenance at scale is impossible.

2. Weak Ties Are Actually Weak: The famous "strength of weak ties" research is misunderstood. Weak ties help when they happen to have relevant information at the right time—not when you mass-produce them hoping one will be useful.

3. Networking Events Are Status Sorting: Everyone at a networking event is trying to network UP, not down. If you're junior, the senior people you want to meet are avoiding you because 50 other juniors are chasing them.

4. Informational Interviews Are One-Sided Transactions: You're asking for someone's time with nothing to offer in return. The people with the best insights are too busy to give "informational interviews" to strangers.

Case Study - The Networking Illusion:

Arun, 28, Software Engineer:

• LinkedIn connections: 2,400+
• Networking events attended in 2023: 15
• Coffee chats with "network": 30+
• Jobs found through networking: 0
• How he actually got his job: Former teammate from 2019 referred him

All that networking busywork produced nothing. One genuine relationship from years of working together did.

Related context: Salary Reality Check, CTC Decoder, more in Career Strategy.

Salary and Growth Reality

Cross-check your take-home with the CTC Decoder and compare ranges in Salary Reality.

Where Most People Get Stuck

Where Networkers Get Permanently Stuck:

The Collection Phase: You spend years collecting connections, attending events, and optimizing your LinkedIn profile. You feel productive. Your network looks big. But when you actually need help, you realize you have 3000 acquaintances and 3 real relationships.

The Transaction Trap: You reach out only when you need something. People sense this. They've received 50 messages from people like you this month. Your "personalized" outreach reads like everyone else's.

The Status Mismatch: You're trying to connect with VPs when you're an individual contributor. They don't respond because they have nothing to gain. You're fishing in the wrong pond.

What Actually Builds Meaningful Connections:

1. Work on Hard Projects Together: Shared struggle creates bonds that survive job changes. This is why former teammates help each other.
2. Help When You Don't Need Anything: Share opportunities, make introductions, solve problems for others. The relationship compounds.
3. Be Known for Something Specific: "Great React developer" gets referred. "Wants to connect" gets ignored.
4. Keep Relationships Alive: 4 messages per year to 50 real contacts is better than 200 cold messages to strangers.
5. Say No to Networking Events: Spend that time doing great work instead. Reputation travels faster than business cards.

The 50-Contact Strategy:

• Identify 50 people who know your work quality (past colleagues, managers, clients)
• Reach out 4x per year with something valuable (article, introduction, congratulations)
• Never ask for anything directly in these touchpoints
• When you need a job, ask specifically: "I'm looking for X at companies like Y. Can you refer me?"

This beats 500 coffee chats with strangers.

If this matches your current situation, run the Resignation Risk Analyzer before making your next move.

Who Should Avoid This Path

Who Should Ignore Traditional Networking Advice:

• Introverts who hate small talk: Your energy is better spent building portfolio work that speaks for itself
• Technical roles where skills matter most: A strong GitHub profile beats 100 LinkedIn connections
• Anyone early in career: You have nothing to offer senior people yet—focus on becoming good first
• Those with demanding jobs: Networking events eat time better spent on visible work contributions

Who Should Actually Network (Intentionally):

• Sales and business development roles: Relationships are literally the product
• Senior executives: You're trading information and influence at similar levels
• Founders raising money: You need to know investors and potential hires
• Freelancers and consultants: Client relationships are everything

Notice the pattern? Networking matters when relationships ARE the work, not when they're supposed to supplement the work.

Decision Framework

Use this quick framework before changing role, company, or specialization.

• If your take-home is not compounding with experience, benchmark externally before accepting internal narratives.
• If role expectations keep rising without title/pay movement, escalate with documented outcomes.
• If growth path is unclear beyond 6-9 months, run a switch-or-specialize decision cycle.

Common Mistakes Checklist

• Treating outlier salaries as planning baselines.
• Using title changes as a substitute for capability changes.
• Delaying market benchmarking until after compensation stagnates.

Real Scenario Snapshot

A professional stays in-role despite rising responsibility and flat pay. Growth recovers only after external benchmarking and a deliberate switch-or-specialize decision.

Originality Lens

Contrarian thesis: Career outcomes usually degrade from quiet trade-offs, not sudden failures.

Non-obvious signal: When responsibility rises but decision rights stay flat, stagnation risk rises even before pay slows.

Evidence By Section